Friday, July 1, 2016

Music plays when the needle drops...

We gave our kids means to buy dinner, gave them strict rules that they must not split up or leave anyone behind, and told them to have fun.  Then we went to dinner.  Just the two of us. 

In the middle of the park, we sat at a winery and had a meal to celebrate our twenty years of marriage. Our table sat next to a fountain and herb garden, and with the magic only held by Disney, made us feel like we could have been in another country.  (All those "date nights" you think you're going to have as a married couple?  Ha!  They are spent sitting in the stands at ball games, taking people to practice, or when you are living right, going to bed before 10!)

To be honest, this twentieth year was hard.  There's this misconception I had that marriage is supposed to get easier as the years go by.  But ugh....we aren't there yet if that's the case.  (And this was a year that held no hospital stays or surgeries!)  Massive amounts of grace have been poured on each other from both sides. Grace, forgiveness, love...copious amounts of all three required to make it to 20 years and every day after. 

Slow to start at first, our dinner conversation eventually turned to answering the question, "What would you do differently?"  Some obvious mistakes I'd love to change, but overall?  Really, not much.  Too many of the difficulties that have come our way, whether we've been in control of them or not, have taught me too much.  Where would we be without the struggle?  Who would I be?  Every struggle, from the years-long argument of which way towels should be folded, to "we need/don't need a dog," and "we need/don't need another dog," to financial issues and parenting...all have taught me and shaped me into who I am now.  Not that I wouldn't give up some of the pain we've endured, but the blessings that always rise to the top are immeasurable.  I see this in our children more and more every day in how they treat others and how they look at life. 

In the middle of the daily whirlwind of life, this is a hard truth to remember. So is stuff like what is on the grocery list when you're at the store and if I took my vitamins for the day, but I digress.   The knowledge of being certain Who is in control helps weather the storms, because no doubt the storms will come.  We just have to be prepared to hold tight and ride it out.  Then afterward, assess and do whatever it takes to mend what was damaged in the process. 

Listen to this.  Just so happens it was written and performed by a kid who grew up the same place I did...

"Music plays when the needle drops
Through the scars on the vinyl..." - Eric Paslay

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